feeling the fear and doing it anyway

Blog

Oct 18

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about courage, about being brave. I’ve let my mind dwell on the stories of old and the bravest found within. How these ones-just-like-us were both flawed and courage-filled at the very same time. That with curiosities high and angst peaking, they went for it anyway.

I think of how these Greats – who at the time I bet did not feel so very great – were made into who they were because of their faith.

It was their conviction to trust and act on crazy and holy plans that made them bold.

These. Who made their faith submit to fear.

These. Who kept swatting the doubts away like an annoying fly and chose to believe that God was going to come through like He said He would.

Like they’d seen Him do before.

They believed He’d move the mountain because His word is titanium. Holding up every time. Even when it looks like it may not.

I don’t want to let the things I see with my eyes ruin what I’ve heard in my heart.

What’s faith perceive? I wanna live right there.

Even if God pulls a Gideon on me and takes my 32,000-man army down to 300. When I’m headed in to fight the bigger and seemingly stronger, I wanna be chanting under my breath, “His word is gold. Stay strong, girl. Keep your courage. He hasn’t gone anywhere. His moment’s about to come. And with it, yours.”

Over and over in repetition till my mouth convinces my mind. And my spirit is strengthened. And until I watch the biggest and baddest — all 135,000 of them — fall right in front of me without a weapon-of-this-world ever lifted.

“I’ll be with you. I won’t give up on you; I won’t leave you…Strength! Courage! Don’t be timid; don’t get discouraged. God, your God, is with you every step you take.” (Joshua 1:5,9)